"Love and Self Control"

Love and Self-Control

We are starting a two part series titled “Show Me The Love.”

This week I will preach and teach on Monitoring which involves keeping track of your thoughts, feelings and
actions.

Next week (February 13th) I will preach and teach on Standards which are guidelines that steer us toward
desirable responses.

This week’s sermon is titled “Love and Self-Control”

You Ready… Let’s Go!!!

Galatians 5:13-26 (NIV)
You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh [a] ; rather, serve one
another humbly in love.  14  For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as
yourself.” [b]   15  If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.
16  So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.  17  For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever [c]  you want.  18  But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19  The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery;  20  idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions  21  and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  23  gentleness and self- control. Against such things there is no law.  24  Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.  25  Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.  26  Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

The Setting
 Talk about the importance of relationships – it is at the root of all we do
The word relationship or theme of relationships appear in the Bible 5734
 Definition of Relationships (noun)
1. The way in which two or more concepts, objects or people are connected or the state of being connected
2. The way in which two or more people or groups regard and behave toward each other

 God created people to be in relationship with himself and with one another
 Talk about love – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7;13 (NIV)
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  5  It does not dishonor others, it
is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  6  Love does not delight in evil but
rejoices with the truth.  7  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 13  And now
these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

 Now the essence of the Fruits of the Spirit is relationships and how to treat those we love, because
we are commanded to love our neighbors, right?

 There is one important aspect that is often overlooked in the Fruits of the Spirit. That is self-control. It is
that lack of self-control that breaks down and destroy our relationships

Scripture says this about self-control… To exercise self-control is to discipline ourselves, set boundaries, and rule
over our actions. A lack of self-control, then, leads to the free reign of fleshly, worldly patterns that end up
exercising control over us. What is in your sinful nature that causes you to lack self-control in your relationship?
Is it:
 Alcohol
 Drugs
 Smoking
 Adultery
 Jealousy
 Money

 Selfish/Spoiled
 Controlling Attitude
 Anger
 Unforgiving Spirit
 Pride
 Food
 Tongue
 Emotions

 My question to you today as I preach and teach the Word is simply this:

How do/can you meet the command of loving your neighbor without self-control?

Ask your neighbor – Do you have self-control?

Control Your Tongue

Galatians 5:13-15 (NIV)

   You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the
flesh [a] ; rather, serve one another humbly in love.  14  For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this
one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” [b]   15  If you bite and devour each other, watch
out or you will be destroyed by each other.

Example

 Argument between couple
 Kids basketball game
 Shared about special plans for his birthday; he said something slick; on and poppin’
 Went from 0-60
 I wondered what could have happened in that short amount of time to make them lose all self-control of
their tongue

Matthew 15:11 – What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is
what defiles them.”

Psalm 34:13 – keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling lies.

Proverbs 18:20-21 – From the fruit of their mouth a person’s stomach is filled; with the harvest of their lips
they are satisfied. 21 The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Proverbs 17:27-28 – The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is
even-tempered. 28 Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.

Ephesians 4:29 – Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building
others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

1 Peter 3:10 –  For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips
from deceitful speech.

Colossians 4:6 – Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to
answer everyone.

Psalm 141:3 – Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.

Matthew 15:18 – But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these defile them.

Tell your neighbor – Watch Your Tongue; It Can Destroy Relationships!!

Control Your Emotions

Galatians 5:16-21 (NIV)
 16  So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.  17  For the flesh desires what is
contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so
that you are not to do whatever [c]  you want.  18  But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the
law. 19  The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery;  20  idolatry and
witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions  21  and envy;
drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit
the kingdom of God.

 Paul puts it like this in 1 Corinthians 3:1-3 (NIV)…
Brothers and sisters, I could not address you as people who live by the Spirit but as people who are
still worldly—mere infants in Christ.  2  I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for
it. Indeed, you are still not ready.  3  You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and
quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere humans? 

 Gavin….. Grow Up
 Goes outside the will of his father; Had to be sat down by his father
 How many of you know that God (the Father) will sit you down until you are ready; until you GROW UP!
 Quit making emotional decisions
 Stay out of your emotions; lead to self-destruction
 The Bible says No weapons formed against me shall prosper; sometimes you are THE WEAPON
 Somebody has to save you from you so the Lord has to sit you down

Read Proverbs 16:32 – Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a
city. (NLT)

The Lord gave us dominion over EVERYTHING, including your emotions!!

Tell your neighbor – Check yourself before you wreck yourself!!

The Good News

Read Galatians 5:24-26 (NIV)
 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.  25  Since we live by
the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.  26  Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each
other.

I just came by to tell you that love and self-control is critical relationships in the lives of believers. The
Christian life is essentially not a list of things we do or avoid doing. Everything has been done for our salvation
by Christ. Our loving God has loved us in sending his Son to win our salvation through his death on the cross. The
holy God has let Jesus bear the punishment of our sin. Now it is our privilege to be forgiven, to be reconciled to
God, and to enter a Father-child relationship with him. Everything in life springs from that relationship, which is
a gift of grace.

Just know that Jesus…

 PAID THE PRICE ON CALVARY

 HE WAS BRUISED FOR INQUITY. HE WAS WOUNDED FOR OUR TRESSGRESSIONS. THE
CHASTISEMENT OF OUR PEACE WAS UPON HIM. AND BY HIS STRIPES WE ARE HEALED
 HE DIED ON THE CROSS FOR OUR SINS  HE WAS RAISED 3 DAYS LATER TO DEFEAT DEATH
 HE NOW SITS ON THE RIGHT HAND OF THE FATHER

Believe and trust that Jesus wants the very best loving relationships for you!! (Amen)

Tell your neighbor – It’s All About Love and Self-Control!!